Today suddenly got bad. The grief hit within minutes and I was gasping for air again. Waves, upon waves... Never ending. I think I’m doing ok, but I still can’t accept life without you. I hold things you’ve touched and feel close to you. How can we go through such a cruel separation and be ok? We won’t be and we can’t be. Do we have to accept that this is it now? Just a struggle to the finish line? I just don’t know sis. I stared at a picture of us, where you’re stood above me with your hand protectively laid on my shoulder. I stared at it for a while, wishing and hoping that your hand is still on my shoulder, however and whenever. I just don’t know. How to navigate. Through this. It doesn’t ever end or get any easier. If anything it’s harder. I need to feel your hand on my shoulder. “You taught me precious secrets Of a true love You wanted nothing You came out in front When I was hiding But now I’m so much better And if my words don’t come together Listen to the melody Cause my love is in there hiding” I’m having a Dené day. Everyday is a Dené day. I can’t be in anymore pain from missing you so sorely, it really hurts. I love you so much sis. Today, tomorrow, forever and always. ❤️