Do you remember Groundhog Day pie? Every morning he opens his eyes and for a split second everything is ok, then reality sits in and he remembers....that's how it is. You've plunged me into some kind of nightmarish Groundhog Day. Approaching two years and I'm still asking myself how the fuck am I still here? I miss you pie so much. I know you're with me and I know you're watching over jay but it's never going to be enough. You're my baby. You're the one I grew in my tummy, birthed for 29 hours, looked after every day with no help, single parent for 5 years, nothing can fill that, nobodies pain can match that, except for your baby boy. I'm tired of missing you my gorgeous girlie, I just want to lay down beside you and never come back. I love you my noodle so so much xxxxxxxxxxxxx